My Blog

 Hmmmm.

i really just feel like i need to get this off my chest.

i feel really shit atm.
i’m down about everything.

now boys, ehhhh i put my heart on the line.
and people tell me it’s better if you tell them.
then my heart get’s broken.
i did have the perfect boy, but i fucked that up.
i’v only had 3 propor relationships in my life.
and they were the only 3 guys.
who didn’t care how i looked in the morning
they loved me for who i am, not my looks or weight.

hmmm.
i really don’t know.
i think about life ahead.
and i really don’t think it’s worth living.
i’m so weak.
i dunno.

eh thanks for reading i guess.

xo.

Youre jealous again
No,
Hes just a friend

Why cant I do anything without being yelled at?

Always on the phone

Never leave me alone
Why dont you just tell me

what you want from me

Said Ill never leave you,
no Ill never leave you
Its not the end, no its not the end

I wont beat you up

But I wont push you around

Because if I do that the cops would grab me for doin it

I want to go and have some fun
Go where the action is
Who the hell are you to tell me who my friends are

Said Ill never leave you, no Ill never leave you

Its not the end, no its not the end

Youre jealous again!

Driving you to the airport
watching you walk off to the
plane that did carry you away
you were too sad to look
back to wave goodbye
so i’m not going to tell
you what you missed
and im not going to tell myself
that i will never find you
going in those lights again
cause i dont know if i will
ever have that chance
but still i’ll never forget
those days we had
and i’ll never forget
those nights in the dark
in the pitch black moon light
the streets of this town are still cold
and still windy but doesnt feel the same
you said lets just leave it to fate
so i guess i’ll just have
to leave it to fate
and wait and remember
those days turned to nights
when in the night
that light shone down upon you
made you look like the
star that you were
when in the night
that light shone down upon you
yeah…

Well instead of talking about myself as i usually do for blogs, i want to know what you are doing!

What has your year been like? Hard, easy, moderate? Exciting?

What about New Years? I am so excited about new years and having the family round and celebrating everything!
What are you getting family and friends??
What do you do for new years?

So yes now that i’ve asked these questions i’d love you to answer some, or all, or maybe even more stuff you can think of!

I just want to make sure all my friends know how much i care about them and how much i want to get to know those i’m not so close to!

Have a nice day
Dilla xoxo

ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm…i didnt realize how many people were
gonna say happy bday… so if u did… and i didnt thank you… well here
it is… i would have prefered money… but friendster is nothing but a
bunch of cheap bastards… soooo a messages or testi is all i get…THANK YOU!!!!!!!!

whatever… just wanna say that a lot of shit is running through my mind…

im out….

When did life get so crazy that people don’t take d time to help others, and consider d thoughts and feelings of others? I won’t exclude myself, I tend to get so wrapped up in d things of d world that I fail to bare people up when they need a hand or a shoulder to cry on. I was talking to a friend of mine yesterday about some things He has been going through he’s whole life and so recently have been bringing him down to almost nothing left.

I don’t know to how much of a degree, but I’ve been there. I’ve felt some very depressing, hopeless feelings. Now how could I not be there for him. It’s frustrating to me, I wish I was emotionally stronger. I tend to take on the emotions of others, and in the process I bring myself down and it makes things hard for me. I wish it wasn’t that way though. I want more than anything for the people around me to be happy, but I take things personal sometimes and I deal with my own emotional shortcomings that I find it hard to be the person I desperately wish I could be to all the people who are struggling. That’s the kicker in life. I can’t be all over d place at the same time. I have to pick and choose my battles. To get back to the dude I was talking to…Life is so hard sometimes. Its so easy to look at things when life is going great and think its a piece of cake.

Truth be told, life is REALLY HARD. And one of the only things we really have is each other. So at this point I’ll take some time to find out how I can help those physically, spiritually and emotionally in distress. The only real way to heal emotional and spiritual wounds is to help others with theirs. I would only hope that if I was in the situation where I really needed someone there, that someone would have the strength to carry some of my burdens, even though I’m so prideful I have a hard time letting anyone carry them for me. But finding happiness and helping others find theirs is what life is all about. I know the only way I will find mine is to help others find theirs……A lending hand to help you stand.

&& its the little things about you
that make me absolutely crazy for you

No matter what happens, or how bad it seems today,
life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow

Don’t worry about stupid d.r.a.m.a
have fun. dance wild, fall in love, say what you wanna say,
do what you wanna do regret nothing - and do not let people
who dont matter bring you down.

We arent young forever

explaining my love to him
is like explaining colors
to a blind person